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Be Yourself.
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2009-08-30, 1:04 AM
FUNNY & STUPID THINGS TO SAY TO PPL Recently i went 2 dis guys blog and he had this HEELAREEOUS post. I laughed my ass abt dis thing. Copied and Pasted from Adam's Blog Thank you Adam fr making my life a little crazier. keep scrolling down \/ (it gets funnier) Dear Bryan I don't really know how to tell you this, you're a leprechaun. I think I realized it when you smacked my ass in a clown suit and I saw you sit on The Catholic Priest. I'm sure you're shamed enough to understand that you need a sex change. I'm returning your toe ring to you, but I'll keep my virginity as a memory. You should also know that I hate your cooking and I'm off to lead a new life as a lemon. Best luck on the sex change, Alex **************************************************************************sry bryan! Its just a joke.(But u need a sex change.) Here's how you do it , Dear (the last person you talked to on msn), I don't really know how to tell you this,(1). I think I realized it (2)(3) and I saw you (4)(5). I'm sure you're (6) enough to understand (7). I'm returning your (8) to you, but I'll keep (9) as a memory. You should also know that I (10) and (11). (12), (your name) 1) What's the color of your shirt? Blue - I'm in love with your cat Red - Our affair is over White - I’m joining the Convent Black -Our romance is over Green- Our socks don't match Grey - You're a leprechaun Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy Pink - Your nostrils are insulting Brown - The mafia wants you No shirt - Purple hedgehogs want to destroy you Other -I dislike your eyelashes 2) Pick your favourite month of the year? January - That night you picked your nose February -When I quoted Forrest Gump March - When your dwarf bit me April - When I tripped on peanut butter May - When I threw up in your sock drawer June - When you put cuffs on me July – When I saw the purple monkey August - When you smacked my ass September - Last year when you peed your pants October - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub November - When your dog humped my leg December - When I finally changed my underwear 3) Which food do you prefer? Tacos - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub Chicken- In your car Pasta - Outside of your office Hamburgers - Under the bus Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner Lasagna - In your closet Kebab - With Jean Chrétien Fish - In a clown suit Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert Pizza - At the mental hospital Hot dog - Under a street light Other - With George Bush and Stephen Harper 4) What's the color of your socks? Yellow - Ignore Red - Put whipped cream on Black - Hit on Blue - Knock out Purple - Pour syrup on White - Carve your initials into Grey - Pull the clothes off Brown - bit of Orange - Castrate Pink - Pull the pants off of Barefoot - Sit on Other - Drive over 5) What's the color of your underwear? Black - My boyfriend White - My father Grey – The Catholic Priest Brown – The Montreal Canadian’s goalie Purple - My corned beef hash Red – My knee caps Blue - My salt-beef bucket Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana Orange - My Blink 182 cd Pink – Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection Other --The elephant in the corner 6) What do you prefer to watch on TV? One Tree Hill - Senile Heroes- Frostbitten Lost - High Simpsons- Cowardly The news - Scarred American Idol - Masochistic Family Guy - Open Top Model - Middle-class Other -shamed 7) Your mood right now? Happy - How awful you are Sad - How boring you are Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men Angry - That your smell makes me vomit Depressed – That we’re related Excited - That I may pee my pants Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you Worried - That your Ford sucks Apathetic - That you need a sex-change Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes Cuddly - That Santa doesn't exist Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid Other - That your driving sucks 8) What's the color of your walls in your bedroom? White - Your toe ring Yellow - Your love letters to me Red - The pictures from Vegas Black - Your pet rock Blue - The couch cushions Green - Your car Orange - Your false teeth Brown - Your nose hair clippers Grey - Our matching snoopy underwear Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket Pink - cut toenails Other - Your Hannah Montana underwear 9) The first letter of your first name? A/B - My virginity C/D - Your photo with the moustache drawn on it E/F - Your neighbors dog G/H - The oil tank from your car I/J - Your left ear K/L - The results of that blood-sample M/N - Your glass eye O/P - My common sense Q/R - Your mom S/T - Your collection of butterflies U/V - Your criminal record W/X – Your sucide note Y/Z - Your credit cards 10) The last letter in your last name? A/B - Love your sweet, sweet ass C/D - Always will remember the pep talks E/F -Never will forget that night G/H – Will not tell the authorites that you stole the whale from the backyard I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly K/L - Hate your cooking M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises Q/R - Always wanted to break your legs S/T - Get sick when I think of your feet U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart W/X - Haven’t showered in a month Y/Z – am better off without you 11) What do you prefer to drink? Wine- Our friendship is ruined Soft drink – I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon Soda – I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo Milk - The apartment building is on fire Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war Mineral/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird Whiskey - I love Oprah Winfrey Beer – Thanks for the Cocaine Other – you should stop picking your nose 12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation? Thailand – Warm tingly sensations Australia - Best of luck on the sex change France - Love always Spain - With tears of sadness China – You make me sick Germany – Please don’t hurt me Japan - Go milk a cow Greece - Your everlasting enemy USA - Greetings to your frog Leonard Egypt – Kiss my butt England - Go drown yourself |
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